Relation II
or
Manifestations of her Spiritual State
which St. Teresa Submitted to Her Confessors
or
Spiritual Testimonies
or
Relations of the Spirit
_______________________
To One of Her Confessors,
from the House of
Dona Luisa de la Cerda, in 1562.
[638]
________________________
Discussion Topics / Questions
to keep in mind
as we read along
1). St. Teresa stated that,
"God has...protected me...
so that I have not become worse;
on the contrary,
I see a great change for the better"
How did she improve?
[ Relations 2:
# 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9
10,11,13,14,15,16,17 ]
2). What did St. Teresa specifically
say regarding the benefits of
her trances (raptures) and visions?
[ Relations 2: #1, 5, 15 ]
3). Why did St. Teresa desire
that others be detached ?
[ Relations 2: #13 ]
4). Why did St. Teresa say
that she wrote about
her current improved spiritual state
in comparison with her past?
[ Relations 2: #18 ]
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Relations II
Jesus.
I think it is more than a year
since this was written;
God has all this time
protected me with His hand,
so that I have not become worse;
on the contrary,
I see a great change for the better
in all I have to say:
May He be praised for it all!
1. The visions and revelations
have not ceased,
but they are of a much higher kind.
Our Lord has taught me
a way of prayer,
wherein I find myself far
more advanced,
more detached
from the things of this life,
more courageous, and
more free. [639]
I fall into a trance more frequently,
for these ecstasies at times
come upon me
- with great violence, and
- in such a way
as to be outwardly visible,
I, having no power to resist them;
and even when I am with others
-- for they come in such a way
as admits of no disguising them,
unless it be by letting people suppose that,
as I am subject to disease of the heart,
they are fainting-fits;
I take great pains, however,
to resist them
when they are coming on
-- sometimes I cannot do it.
2. As to poverty,
God seems to have wrought
great things in me;
for I would willingly be
without even what is necessary,
unless given me as an alms; and
therefore my longing is extreme
that I may be in such a state
as to depend on alms alone for my food.
It seems to me that to live,
when I am certain
of food and raiment
without fail,
is not so complete an observance
of my vow ( of poverty) or
of the counsel of Christ
as it would be to live
where no revenue is possessed, and
I should be in want at times;
and as to the blessings
that come with true poverty,
they seem to me to be great,
and I would not miss them.
Many times do I find myself
with such great faith,
that I do not think God will ever fail
those who serve Him, and
without any doubt whatever
that there is, or can be, any time
in which His words are not fulfilled:
I cannot persuade myself to the contrary,
nor can I have any fear;
and so, when they advise me
to accept an endowment, I
feel it keenly, and
betake myself unto God.
( I become greatly distressed and
turn to God
-Peer's translation )
3. I think I am
much more compassionate
towards the poor
than I used to be,
having
a great pity for them and
a desire to help them;
for if I regarded only my good will,
I should give them even the habit I wear.
I am not fastidious with respect to them,
even if I
had to do with them or
touched them with my hands,
-- and this I now see is a gift of God;
for though I used to give alms for His love,
I had no natural compassion.
I am conscious
of a distinct improvement herein.
4. As to the evil speaking
directed against me,
-- which is
considerable, and
highly injurious to me, and
done by many, --
I find myself herein
also very much the better.
I think that what they say
makes scarcely any more impression
upon me
than it would upon an idiot.
I think at times, and nearly always,
that it is just.
I feel it so little
that I see nothing in it
that I might offer to God,
as I learn by experience
that my soul gains greatly thereby;
on the contrary,
the evil speaking seems to be a favour.
And thus,
the first time I go to prayer,
I have no ill-feeling against them;
the first time I hear it,
it creates in me a little resistance,
but it neither disturbs nor moves me;
on the contrary,
when I see others
occasionally disturbed,
I am sorry for them.
So it is, I put myself out of the question;
for all the wrongs of this life
seem to me so light,
that it is not possible to feel them,
because I
imagine myself to be dreaming, and
see that all this will be nothing
when I awake.
5. God is giving me
more earnest desires,
a greater love of solitude,
a much greater detachment, as I said,
with the visions;
by these He has made me know
what all that is,
even if I gave up all the friends I have,
both men and women and kindred.
This is the least part of it:
my kindred are rather
a very great weariness to me;
I leave them in all freedom and joy,
provided it be to render
the least service unto God;
and thus on every side I find peace.
6. Certain things,
about which I have been warned in prayer,
have been perfectly verified.
Thus, considering the graces
received from God,
I find myself very much better;
but, considering my service to Him
in return,
I am exceedingly worthless,
for I have received greater consolation
than I have given,
though sometimes that gives me
grievous pain.
My penance is very scanty,
the respect shown me great,
much against my own will very often.
[640]
However in a word, I see
that I live an easy,
not a penitential, life;
God help me, as He can!
7. It is now nine months, more or less,
since I wrote this with mine own hand;
since then I have not turned my back
on the graces which God has given me;
I think I have received,
so far as I can see,
a much greater liberty of late.
Hitherto I thought
I had need of others, and
I had more reliance on worldly helps.
Now I clearly understand
that all men are bunches
of dried rosemary, and
that there is no safety in leaning on them,
for if they are pressed
by contradictions or evil speaking
they break down.
And so I know by experience
that the only way not to fall is to
- cling to the cross, and
- put our trust in Him
who was nailed thereto.
I find Him a real Friend, and
With Him
I find myself endowed with such might
that, God never failing me,
I think I should be able
to withstand the whole world
if it were against me.
8. Having a clear knowledge of this truth,
I used to be very fond
of being loved by others;
now I do not care for that, yea,
rather, their love seems to weary me
in some measure,
excepting
theirs who take care of my soul, or
theirs to whom I think I do good.
Of the former
I wish to be loved,
in order that they may bear with me; and
Of the latter,
that they may be more inclined
to believe me
when I tell them that all is vanity.
9. In the very grievous trials, persecutions,
and contradictions of these months, [641]
God gave me great courage; and
the more grievous they were,
the greater the courage,
without weariness in suffering.
Not only had I no ill-feeling
against those
who spoke evil of me,
but I had, I believe,
conceived a deeper affection for them.
I know not how it was;
Certainly it was a gift
from the hand of our Lord.
10. When I desire anything,
I am accustomed naturally
to desire it with some vehemence;
now my desires are so calm,
that I do not even feel that I am pleased
when I see them fulfilled.
Sorrow and joy,
excepting in that which relates to prayer,
are so moderated,
that I seem to be without sense, and
in that state I remain for some days.
11. The vehement longings
to do penance
which come, and have come, upon me
are great;
and if I do any penance,
I feel it to be so slight
in comparison with that longing,
that I regard it
sometimes, and almost always,
as a special consolation;
however, I do but little,
because of my great weakness.
12. It is a very great pain to me
very often, and at this moment
most grievous,
that I must take food,
particularly if I am in prayer.
It must be very great,
for it makes me
weep much, and
speak the language of affliction,
almost without being aware of it,
and that is what
I am not in the habit of doing,
for I do not remember
that I ever did so
in the very heaviest trials of my life:
I am not a woman in these things,
for I have a hard heart.
13. I feel in myself
a very earnest desire,
more so than usual,
that God may find those
who will serve Him,
particularly learned men,
in all detachment, and
who will not cleave
to anything of this world,
for I see it is all a mockery;
for when I see
the great needs of the Church,
I look upon it as a mockery
to be distressed about aught else.
I do nothing
but pray to God for such men,
because I see that one person,
who is wholly perfect in the true fervour
of the love of God,
will do more good
than many who are lukewarm.
14. In matters concerning the faith,
my courage seems to me much greater.
I think I could
go forth alone by myself
against (those that left the church) and
convince them of their errors.
I feel very keenly the loss of so many souls.
I see many persons making great progress;
I see clearly
it was the pleasure of God
that such progress should have been
helped by me; and
I perceive that my soul, of His goodness,
grows daily more and more in His love.
15. I think
I could not be led away by vainglory,
even if I seriously tried, and
I do not see
how I could imagine
any one of my virtues to be mine,
for it is not long since I was
for many years
without any at all; and
now so far as I am concerned,
I do nothing but receive graces,
without rendering
any service in return,
being the most worthless creature
in the world.
And so it is
that I consider at times
how all, except myself, make progress;
I am good for nothing in myself.
This is not humility only,
but the simple truth;
and the knowledge
of my being so worthless
makes me sometimes think with fear
that I must be under some delusion.
Thus I see clearly
that all my gain
- has come through
the revelations and the raptures,
in which I am nothing myself, and
- (I) do no more to effect them
than the canvas does for the picture
painted on it.
This makes me feel secure and be at rest; and I
place myself in the hands of God, and
trust my desires;
for I know for certain
that my desires are
to die for Him, and
to lose all ease, and
that whatever may happen.
16. There are days wherein
I remember times without number
the words of St. Paul, [642]
--though certainly
they are not true of me,--
And I live, now not I;
but Christ liveth in me.
And that I live now in the flesh: I live in the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and delivered himself for me
- Galatians 2:20
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that I have
neither life,
nor will of my own,
but that there is One in me
by whom I am directed and made strong;
and I am, as it were, beside myself, and
thus life is a very grievous burden to me.
And the greatest oblation
I make to God,
as the highest service on my part,
is that I,
when I feel it so painfully
to be absent from Him,
am willing to live on for the love of Him.
I would have my life also
full of great tribulations and persecutions;
now that I am unprofitable,
I should like to suffer; and
I would endure all the tribulations
in the world
to gain ever so little more merit
-- I mean,
by a more perfect doing of His will.
17. Everything that I have learnt in prayer,
though it may be two years previously,
I have seen fulfilled.
What I see and understand
of the grandeurs of God, and
of the way He has shown them,
is so high,
that I scarcely ever begin to think of them
but my understanding fails me,
-- for I am as one
that sees things far higher
than I can understand, --
and I become recollected.
18. God so keeps me from offending Him,
that I am verily amazed at times.
I think I discern
the great care He takes of me,
without my taking scarcely any care at all,
being as I was,
before these things happened to me,
a sea of wickedness and sins, and
without a thought
that I was mistress enough of myself
to leave them undone.
And the reason why
I would have this known
is that the great power of God
might be made manifest.
Unto Him be praise for ever and ever!
Amen.
Jesus.
This Relation here set forth,
not in my handwriting, is one
that I gave to my confessor, and
which he with his own hand copied,
without adding or diminishing a word.
He was a most spiritual man
and a theologian:
I discussed the state of my soul with him,
and he with other learned men,
among whom was Father Mancio. [643]
They found nothing in it
that is not in perfect agreement
with the holy writings.
This makes me calm now,
though, while God is leading me by this way,
I feel that it is necessary for me
to put no trust whatever in myself.
And so I have always done,
though it is painful enough.
You, my father, will be careful
that all this goes under the seal of confession,
according to my request.
Foot Notes:
[638] Addressed, it is believed,
to her confessor, Fr. Pedro Ibanez.
This Relation corresponds with
[ 479] ch. xxxiv. of the Life
( De la Fuente).
[639] See [480]Life, ch. xxvii.
[640] See [481]Life, ch. xxxi. § 15.
[641] The Saint is supposed to refer
to the troubles she endured during the
foundation of the monastery of St. Joseph.
[642] Gal. ii. 20: "Vivo autem, jam non ego;
vivit vero in me Christus."
[643] A celebrated Dominican, professor of theology
in Salamanca (Bouix).
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| ~ End of Relation II ~ |
